ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
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