this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
Welp last night I made out with the guy who slices my deli meat at publix. I'm sure there's a joke there but I'm too hungover to find it. Go noles.
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
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