Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
Randomize
