Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
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