I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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