I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
We are all done wearing pants today
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
The air taste purple.
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