And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Randomize
