Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize
