Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
