i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
Randomize
