You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
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