i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
Randomize
