Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
My new roommate looks like a troll. Or a serial killer. So if I disappear, show this text to the cops.
Randomize
