I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Randomize
