that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
Randomize