this beer tastes like vomit already
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
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