I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
We're too hungover to prance.
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
Randomize
