All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
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