I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
Randomize