im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize
