He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
These tits shall not be calmed
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
Randomize