I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
So the woman who sold us weed at the park is pregnant. With another small child. And the basket she used to carry the joints is decorated with Barney stickers.
She's like a yuppie Nancy Botwin. She just gets better and better.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
