and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
Randomize