Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize
