my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
Randomize
