you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
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