i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.
Top night. Top night.
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
Randomize
