The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
You may now shotgun with the bride
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
Randomize
