My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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