I bet he comes in French.
Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
i just woke up in the woods behind my house in handcuffs and a dan marino jersey ive never seen before
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
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