I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
