ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Randomize
