I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
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