wanna go halves on a baby?
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
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