I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
i just made my gag reflex go away.
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
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