Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize
