I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
Randomize
