420 ftw
Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
Randomize
