No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
