I just cut my nipple shaving
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
