party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
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