Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
Randomize
