I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
being pregnant is like rehab
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
Randomize
