Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
