She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
There's a burrito next to my bed. Did you buy it for me or is the Chipotle fairy real? And why am I naked?
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
Randomize