My boss just called me into his office to apologize for being an "inadvertant cockblock"
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
Found the puke drawer
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize
