You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
My chiropractor just high fived me for getting drunk enough to throw my back out this weekend.. Life. Complete.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
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