Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
i used baking grease as lip gloss
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
Randomize
