I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
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