perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
We're too hungover to prance.
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
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