I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize
